Domestic Violence, the Mob, and the Elephants in the Room

The incident involving Ray Rice and his wife Janay has lit fire to the mob and news coverage surrounding domestic violence. Domestic violence has no place in our society. Men, women, sports teams, corporations, small businesses and the regular Joe and Jada had better take note. If you are arrested for perpetrating domestic violence you’re done — or at least that seems where we are headed. To reiterate, domestic violence has no place in our society. Should perpetrators of domestic violence be punished and held accountable, my answer is a blanket yes. Should perpetrators lose their lively hood because of it? In some cases yes, in some cases no. Each situation should be handled based on the facts of the event, severity of the violence, the job held, and context in which the violence occurred.

Ray Rice was suspended two games, which I felt was not punishment enough. He was later suspended indefinitely from the NFL and couldn’t seek employment in the CFL, which I feel is punishment in the extreme. Legally, this headline and article says it all: Ray Rice case: N.J. lawmakers question prosecutor's decision, but experts say it's common. Getting it right is not easy, and the way forward will be hard as we reconcile the violence that occurs between men and women in our society, but going to extremes does nothing to remedy the problem, and selective outrage does nothing but make the outraged seem fickle.

Domestic violence appears to have been an issue in the NFL for quite some time, and is likely an issue in all major sports, including CONCACAF. Yet the mob never formed before this; what is it about this case that set the blaze? In 2012, Kim Rabb wrote, “A Silent Epidemic: Spousal Abuse is the Military's Best Kept Secret,” yet there was no mob. Superstar Mel Gibson pleaded no contest in 2011 to one count of misdemeanor spousal battery of his former girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva. He was sentenced to three years of probation, domestic violence counseling and two days of community service, went on to star in four movies, and yet there was no mob. There are individuals that have been killed and beaten by police officers, and yet there was no mob. In some cases the Police were defended. With regard to the subject at hand, Conor Friedersdorf wrote, “Research suggests that family violence is two to four times higher in the law-enforcement community than in the general population. So where's the public outrage?” My sentiments exactly. Lastly, a Federal Judge, which has tremendous power and responsibility, in August was arrested and charged with misdemeanor battery, and yet there was no mob. Again, I concede and agree with those who feel Ray Rice was wrong, and everyone involved handled the situation poorly. However, I find the aftermath disturbing. Look at these charts which are based on information that has been available since 1999 and 2008 respectively, where is the outrage: 

Domestic violence has no place in our society. Perpetrators must be held accountable. The fact that we as a society have identified that there needs to be a discussion surrounding perpetrator punishment and what can be done to help victims is a good thing regardless of how we got here. However, the coverage and “elephant in the room” double standards are counter productive to the aim of reducing domestic violence in our society.